Nico's Delivery: First 48
Hello wonderful people,
Going into labor was one of my greatest fears. I read so many stories about women that don’t make it due to complications. The fact that I had to do it without my husband made it even scarier for me. For a little backstory, my husband enlisted in the Air Force while I was 6 months pregnant. I endured my last trimester alone and raised our son alone for his first 5 months of life. This was a difficult and painful experience and I want to share my story to let others that will go through this know that it gets better.
Throughout my pregnancy, I had gestational diabetes, so I had a very strict diet. I was so hard on myself that I didn’t even eat cake at my own baby shower. Absurd?--I know! I made sure to do everything that I could to ensure I had a healthy baby. When he left, I felt ok. I was working to keep myself busy, so it really didn’t hit me just yet. Then, one day I was driving to work sitting at a stoplight. That’s when a huge truck rear-ended me. I was so scared and did not know what to do. I was so in shock that I didn’t even exchange information with the guy and he drove off. I drove myself to the hospital and found out that I was having contractions. I was only 8 months pregnant at the time so they would not let me leave if I did not stop contracting. I was so scared and then it hit me. I wish I was able to call him, and I wish he was able to be there. Unfortunately, he could not be there. I just had to be strong for myself and my baby. I eventually stopped contracting and they let me go home. Right after the hospital, I went to the police station to report the hit and run. They eventually found the driver and I felt so relieved. From that point on I was in and out of the hospital due to contractions, some visits I stayed overnight and some I stayed for days. All I can remember is just praying for safe delivery if Nico decided to come early. I would write his Dad letters and couldn’t bring myself to mention everything that was going on. I didn’t want him to want to come home, and I wanted him to give training his full attention, so I pretended that everything was ok even though I was so lonely and scared.
Surprisingly, after all of that, Nico managed to stay in my womb past his due date and I had to be induced. His dad was just transitioning to a new training base and it was perfect timing. He couldn’t be there physically, but he was able to be there on video chat. I went to be induced at 8PM on 09.28.2018. I was hooked up to at least 5 different fluids, penicillin, insulin, and Pitocin to name a few. My body was so tired and swollen, but I was determined to see it through to the end. Hours were going by and they eventually came in to tell me that Nico was faced the wrong way so I would have to get a c-section. I fought so hard for that not to happen. I was in so much pain, but I got up, turned on some music, and wiggled until I couldn’t anymore. I was facing backward on my knees so that gravity would help bring him down more. It worked! I was finally fully dilated, but he was still facing the wrong way. They still let me push him out. I pushed for about 35 minutes and he was born on 09.29.2018 at 9lbs 1 oz at 4:41pm.
I didn’t even get to hold him because my body went into immediate shock. My body would not stop shaking, I thought my worst fear was coming to fruition. I could hear his dad on the phone asking the doctors why I was shaking, and I wanted to cry because I wish he was there to comfort me in person. Turns out my blood pressure was extremely high. They hooked me up to, yet another fluid, and I was bedridden for 24 hours where I couldn’t eat or move. After the first night in the hospital, my mom had to leave for work to a job she had just started. I didn’t know who else I could call to spend the night with us, I was so scared to be alone with Nico. I didn’t know what to do. That night by myself I cried, and I cried. Nico cried all night long, so I stayed up holding him in my arms the entire night. I cried because I wanted his dad to be there. I called him on the phone, but he was asleep because he had training in the morning. I don’t think I ever felt as hopeless as I did that night. I didn’t even know how to swaddle Nico back into his blanket, I felt so much pain. I didn’t even take any of the pills they prescribed me, even my pain pills for my 4th-degree tear. All because I didn’t want to fall asleep. I wanted to be alert for him, so I sat there in my pain and cried. The amount of fear I felt those two nights seemed unbearable at the time, but as a Mom, you have no other option, but to be there and get ready if you aren't already ready. The first 48 hours was a whirlwind and it was nothing I expected it to be, but it still didn’t prepare me for what was to come. We will have to delve into that another time.
Until next time,
Erica
Comments
You’re so strong and amazing. Love you.